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THat's it... [Sep. 18th, 2002|10:28 am]
[mood |Fed up]

I can't stand it. It's bad enough I've done badly for my prelims. It's bad enough that it has discouraged me immensely. It's bad enough that despite (I swear it), working and studying for it, I still do badly and hence, am very confident that I have a bright future as a road sweeper. It's bad enough that thanks to this, I'd barely have time for my hobbies (no, it's not gaming, it's drawing ya nut). It's bad enough that I'm now reduced to dragging myself out of bed to go to school, and sneaking uses of my PC (using a school's one now) so that I can do the most basic things like check my mail. It's bad enough that I'm hungry, broke, tired and PISSED OFF . Yet, I still manage to draw something, CG it, and hey! it looks pretty good! BUT, what do I get? I get flamed. I get criticised, right in my face. Sure, I've said many times that I want CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, and if anyone were to say something I drew to be nice just for the sake of being nice to me, I'd smash their faces. But to JUST see what's wrong about what I do, despite me putting in immense effort on it, especially in the light of my stress, depression and frustration, without a little peep of "Nice effort Qiang" but instead, making my already low self-esteem go crashing down with a "Neck needs work", THAT PISSES THE HELL OUT OF ME!!!! No, I'm not thrashing anyone in particular even if anyone recognises any comment I quote here. I'm just really upset with everything now. Boy, I can't wait till the report card comes, then I can show my dad my really crappy grades and probably maim myself for life. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE